Insecurity Took Us Late to Realize

"I feel worthless, a true disappointment, lot of bull and just useless"

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

We do consume that statement so many times. we insecure or in other way feeling unsafe, not capable and wrapped up by our own gratify to be seen, to be the one who can handle it all, the know it all and as you can tell we are none of that above 100%. we forget that being normal is also when we are being able to deal with our own flaws and imperfection.

now, what do you guys think about being insecure? when is the right time for you to mostly catch yourself being insecure?

how does it feel?is it tiring? bore to tears? distressful?

I assume you run out of words. you just can't spell it out. it is complicated and it is difficult. insecurity is a source of difficulty, indeed.

what I'm going to tell you here are mostly based on research including books, journals and another opinion personally or groups which agreed and I feel experienced.

so, for some other time, you probably have a couple of apprehensions on discovering yourself and how the world is working. since we were a kid, we see ourself as a soul of freedom, fearless and remarkable. we question everything. we do things we.ve never done before to make certain validation. but, by the time we grow up we comprehend that to get some validation we need to put extra effort to achieve it. when we did, we will be sensible of happiness, appreciated and leverage our self-esteem. but disappointment, despair and miscarriages are also one of the repercussion.

we blame our circumambient to aggressively validate ourself to lessen our pointless feeling. half of us even be in trouble or trauma discovering ourself thru another route.

who are we trying to impress?

from a scale 0-10 where actually we have to stop judging ourself? mark mason once come up with "if you want to sell more stuff than there are problems, you have to encourage people to believe there are problems. where there are none." so what does it mean? it means the more we have desire on the money we need to convince people to buy what we sell. even tho they don't need it, but convincing them to buy what we sell is how the marketing works.

what marketing has to do with insecurity?

where do you think you feel less the most? feel ugly, horrible and purposeless? it's the damn social media. they sell pieces of stuff which saleable thru online or e-commerce. where they convince you to buy this acne gel for example, because your skin isn't good to look enough so they tell you that your skin is going to be lighter, smoother and more like a baby skin when you buy and use their products.

this is where it all started. the more substantial promotion, the more you feel less. So, Filtering your insecurity is all about filtering what you consume on social media. the platform is no way where you know your value.

"The way you measure yourself is how you measure others, and how you assume others measure you." this quote also by Mark Manson is like a bomb when the first time I read it. because the truth is everyone wants to see the flaws of there because they want to see the glimpses of our own insecurities in them. we want to know that we are not the only ones.

now, the last question. Will it all matter when we are in the '70s or '80s?

capturing ourself on edge, figuring out how to exactly fit in with a social expectation. pursuing unreal dreams of becoming flawless and just perfect. let me tell you a story about my mother's experience. well envious experience. she always compares herself with her successful friends that she met after 49 years contactless. most of her friend has been travelling with their big families who are financially capable, has smart kids, nice cars and houses. she was like "oI mean look at us". and I responded "what about us?" and she was like "wish I didn't marry your father".

The only thing I said to her was "mummy, you need to stop comparing. they might have nice cars and good husbands. but don't forget that God still let you breathe till today without puffy. while your friend, your rich friend were set up in heart ring mummy".

since then my mom conceives "damn never thought you smart".

References :

Book- The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson